Thursday, August 5, 2004

"I Want Some Crack!!!"

Tony Montana would be proud.

Quincy Carter was fired today from the Dallas Cowboys for [allegedly] failing a drug test. WHAT!?!?!  A Cowboy on drugs?  NO!  And that drug is rumored to be cocaine.  NO!  There was other news that broke stating that Carter was in rehab during the past year.  GET OUTTA HERE!

I have always had this joke where I explain that the reason the Cowboys use artificial turf at Texas Stadium is because the Cowboys would smoke the real grass and sniff up the white lines off of the field.  It is unreal how one franchise can have THIS much drug use going on.  And not just like an isolated period of time.....the entire life of the franchise.

Michael Irvin was arrested in 2000 for possession of cocaine. Peppi Zellner was arrested for crack cocaine last year. Nate Newton was arrested for transporting cocaine. Leon Lett was a repeated offender of the NFL’s substance abuse policy. Bob Hayes served 6 months for cocaine trafficking. Harvey Martin was jailed on cocaine charges. Lance Rentzal. Thomas Henderson. Clayton Holmes. Mark Tunei.

Nate Newton, the anchor on the mid-90s Cowboy O-lines, got caught moving a van full of the hippie lettuce.  A while awaiting trial....he got busted AGAIN!!  This wasn't just some backup player, he was an All Pro.

I mean….isn’t that why Michael Irvin really retired?? His probation stated that he couldn’t cohort with known felons. So he had to leave the Cowboys. Johnny Cochran is their “Defense Coordinator”. 

I know….I know…no team is exempt from this kind of thing. Heck, my beloved Redskins signed away Zellner and we were the home of Dexter Manley....who couldn't read his name and has battled drug abuse since...well the 5th grade.  Fellow NFC East rival New York had Lawrence Taylor.  The Carolina Panthers had Rae Curruth. And so on and so on.

But, you gotta admit that the Cowboys sure have stepped up their game as far as drug busts go.  And not just drugs.  Drunk driving, statutory rape, parties with "crack whores", etc.  But drugs is where they make their name. 

And it is pretty bad when the Cowboys fire you because of your drug abuse.  And, in the light of Ricky Williams' admission of quitting football for a life on the road following Phish on tour, the NFL really didn't need this.  A basehead as the QB of "America's Team".  DONT MESS WITH TEXAS!!!   

At least the Pot-land Trailblazers are glad that the heat is off them for a moment.

Well...at least until NBA camps open.  Watch out nannies!

2 comments:

monponsett said...

I seem to recall Mr. Newton being arrested for transporting like 400 pounds of weed. While awaiting trial for that, he got arrested for transporting 400 More pounds of weed. Didn't Irvin hold a gun to a girl's head, too?

jamiemottram00 said...

There is no doubt in my mind that approx. 80% of the Cowboys roster owns Scarface on DVD.