Onterrio Smith....one of the 20 running backs on the Vikings roster....was held up in the airport because he was carrying a plastic penis in his luggage. Uh....why would he have that? Or did he just pick up some skank’s luggage by mistake??
Turns out the plastic dong was his. It is called [no kidding] "The Original Whizzinator". It is a druggie dong...meaning players hide it in their pants when trying to beat a drug test. The player whips out the fake hog, which a tube of "clean urine" is released to give the doctor [who is watching] a sample. He also had "cleansing pills" in his luggage...the kind pot-heads have on hand to get past those pesky McDonald’s drug tests.
Included in his bag of tricks was a few vials of a white powder substance. Security checked it to see if he was trafficking cocaine...when he told them it was dried urine.
Smith is a two-time offender of the NFL’s drug abuse policy. One more problem...and he’s out for a year.
I've just checked out their website, The Whizzinator..., and see that their product is $49.99. It is called the "Number 1". Honestly, it looks like some scam that you'd see in the back of some magazine next to the sea monkeys, spanish fly and those correspondant schools. If you do click on the link above...there is a warning of graphic pictures.
If you continue to look, you'll find a ton of these type products. Amazing.
1 comment:
I'm pretty sure that Thomas Jefferson would have included "the right to not have someone analyze your urine" in the Declaration of Independence if the British were trying to test our bodily waste.
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